I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” Michael Jordan
When you increase your self-awareness and your emotional intelligence, it pays dividends in both your personal and professional life.
For example, pay attention to what you think and say – all of the time.
What you say, both to yourself and to others, will determine how you continue to think and act.
You’re basically programming yourself for your future activities, which is why it’s critical to always monitor yourself.
When you do, you might be surprised by what you learn.
I know when I started monitoring everything I think and say, I was surprised at how many of my thoughts were negative. I had no idea I was being negative, and in fact thought I was positive most of the time.
But by monitoring my thoughts, and then cancelling every negative thought with a positive one, I was able to greatly reduce this bad habit. Before I knew it, I was a happier and accomplishing more, with less effort.
Increase your emotional intelligence starting with these five points:
1: Reduce your negative emotions so they don’t overwhelm you and affect your judgment.
2: Learn to stay cool and manage stress, so that you can be assertive rather than reactive.
3: Express difficult emotions when necessary, so that you can set your boundaries and let people know where you stand.
4: Stay proactive and not reactive when dealing with a difficult or challenging person.
5: Learn to bounce back from adversity. As Michael Jordan famously said,
“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
You have certain beliefs in your mind that hold you back from living your fullest life. These beliefs could be about anything… money, career, skills, competition… you name it.
You might think: “I’m not good enough”, “I don’t deserve to be wealthy”, or “He/she’s out of my league.”
Limiting beliefs are often installed in our minds by our well-meaning family, friends, media, or society.
And while it’s not your fault that these beliefs exist in your mind, it is your responsibility to remove them.
Every time you feel that something internal is holding you back, do the following…
1. Name Your Limiting Beliefs
Use sentence completion to have your subconscious mind fill in the blank.
Write down “I am afraid that___.” and finish the sentence 10 times.
These are your limiting beliefs that hold you back.
2. Face Your Limiting Beliefs
Under each of your limiting beliefs you want to write 3-5 ‘reasons why’ you fear those things.
This is digging into the core of these issues and is often more surprising than the beliefs themselves.
3. Disprove Your Limiting Beliefs
Under each of your limiting beliefs, write down as many points of evidence to the contrary as you can.
Go for at least five per limiting belief.
Think of everything in your life (no matter how big or small they may seem) that stands in contrast to your old limiting belief and make note of them.
4. Write Your New Empowered Belief
Reference the old belief briefly, and then in a realistic but compelling manner, state the new empowered belief for each of your ten limiting beliefs.
Ex. “Although I sometimes think I don’t deserve success, I know that I will be successful in my new business. Whenever I have put mind to it, I have been able to accomplish great things with ease.”
5. Repeat as Needed
Although one session is usually enough to give you clarity, it can be helpful to repeat this process multiple times during the next few days and weeks to really cement the change in your thinking.
Use your new beliefs as mantras, and over time they will become your new overriding beliefs.